When the Earth was first created and before humans exsisted there was the animals. Every animal porclaimed it was the most beautiful and was the gods favorite. I have a beautiful white coat. I have feathers and can fly, so I am the favorite. This went on for days and days then the animals started to want what the other animals possessed. I wish I had a tail, I wish I had feathers. Until finally the gods were angered by the animals fighting and decided to step in. So the gods created an all white crocodile, an all white lion and a platapus. Upon seeing thes newly born creatures the animals shunned them for being different. Each of this animals lead a very hard and sad life, and eventually died alone. Then the rest of the animals realized how lucky and gifted they were. They realized their blessings but the question is did you?
One day, in the interests of religious cross-fertilization,
Mal-2 went fishing. He baited the hook with his pineal
gland, and quickly caught a nice big fish. Giggling
maniacally, he dragged the little sucker into the boat and
prepared to sermonize it to death.
"Wait!" said the fish.
"Why?" Mal-2 asked.
"I'm a talking fish! Aren't you curious? Talk to fish all the
time, do you?"
"Nooooooooo."
"Well, then. Listen up. I'm The Cod."
"Was that a proper noun?"
"YES!" pronounced The Cod majestically. "I am a proper
noun bearing COD, and you know what that means."
"Yes," Mal-2 sighed. "I've got to catch a less talkative
fish." He picked up The Cod, and prepared to throw it
back.
"Wait! I come bearing a message!"
Mal-2 sighed again. "I'm under contract to Eris. She made
me sign an exclusivity clause. Besides, no one wants to
listen to a fish."
"That's why YOU have to do the talking for me," Cod
said desperately. "Look, you don't have to worship me,
just, you know, when you tell people about Eris, maybe
just kind of slip in, 'And you are all children of Cod! Hail
Eris!', you know?"
Mal-2 lowered the fish, and looked it pentagonally in the
eye. "We are all Children of Cod?"
"Yep."
"What, ALL of us?"
"Er... yes?"
"Even Eris?"
"Um, no. I guess not."
"So we're all children of Eris as well?"
"Sure. Why not?"
"Are you saying my Goddess had sex with a fish?"
Cod moaned in dismay. "Look, of course not. I'm just
saying..."
"Well, she did."
The Cod paused. "Oh. Right. THAT party... woo. Well,
irregardless. Will you do it?"
"Yes. But one more question about this Children of Cod
thing..."
"Okay," the Cod shrugged. Mal-2 had never seen a fish
shrug before, and was suitably impressed.
"So, all of us are Children of Cod? Everyone except
Eris?"
"Yup."
"What about you? Are you a Child of Cod?" Mal-2 asked.
"Um, yes." said Cod uncertainly. "Yes! Yes I am!"
"How can you be your own child?"
The Cod looked at Mal-2 with an evil glint in his fishy
eye.
"Go fuck yourself!"
And Mal-2 was enlightened. But Cod sank his boat
anyway, just for being a smart-ass. And he got wet, but
didn't drown, and was still enlightened.
Nex, don't pollute too many minds with the principa discordia, i myself am a chaote and those teachings are enough to even make me run into a wall screaming i'm a happy hippo ;)
Nice story Hyena, but as you were telling it i got flashes of threee animals of pure black being born aswell to be the balance, for duality is forever present, but that is just my mind, two beings searching to find each other, opposites driving to become one till there is none.
