is this the right place?

Background: I was in a Domme/sub relationship with an older gentleman who was also teaching me magick. I found out a little while after we began that he is a very dark, sadistic, twisted individual. While I did learn a lot from him, much of it I have forgotten because of the toll it takes on me. The way we parted was...rather bad. He would not let me go, and even threatened me with the health/life of my sister should I attempt to leave him. I am very protective of my sister. Luckily, my parents got me out of there and back home, but no charges were able to be brought because he had already fled the state.

Since that time, I have had crippling nightmares and have felt as if a part of me is missing. I know many people aren't going to believe this and that's okay, but those who do, I need the help. I have a Dissociative Personality Disorder, and I know one of them is from my time with him. I believe that if I can retrieve whatever part of me he took, I can essentially meld the other personality back with my own. I think perhaps my DPD may be more of a spiritual nature than a mental one. The other one is happy to stay apart and I am happy to leave him apart; it is mutually beneficial.

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Seek a shaman who performs soul retrieval. This man may have even purposely done this in hopes that you would come back to him. You'll need someone very experienced and you need to tell them that the man who did this to you practices magick. That factor increases the difficulty and danger (to the shaman) of retrieval if this man in fact consciously took energy from you and it hasn't just hidden itself/gone dormant due to pain/injury.

Don't let just anyone retrieve for you. It CANNOT be done over the internet. It must be done in person. Be sure they are authentic and try to find them through the grape vine (personal recommendations). It's always better that way.

Would it be possible to do it myself? If he has it (which I'm pretty dang sure he does), I think I know how he got it, I just don't know exactly how to get it back. I know I will have to study back up and get my gifts (right word?) back in proper working order.

I've been able to help others before, I just have never been able to help myself. Well, sorta. He sent something after me once, but my other "personality" fought it off, and he hasn't sent anything after me since. However, the memory of him seems to be stuck permanently in my mind, and I'm pretty sure it's not just the physical scars that remind me of him.

I suppose a question to help me figure out if he did what I think he did would be: Is it possible to snag a piece of someone's spirit by...(please don't freak...) eating a piece of them? And if so, would the person who was...eaten...have to consume a piece of the original caster to get it back...or even have any physical contact with them?

This thread has been moved to Other Spells Discussion from Spell Suggestions.

During times of great stress, such as trauma, are energy is more suseptable to damage and influencement. Sometimes a piece of our core energy (call it spirit, soul, what have you) "runs away" and either attaches to the one we lost (in divorce for example) or goes dormant and "hides" within us until we are able to reaccept it. Other times very controlling and/or possessive people can unconsciously "steal" a piece of this energy. Of course, what can be done unconsciously can be done consciously if you still have a connection to them (all relations make links between two people, even merely friendship). The connection is key. People cannot just walk up to another person and take a chunk out of this sort of energy. The connection allows it because naturally, these sort of links exchange small amounts of energy normally. The more emotionally involved, the more "open" the connection is, allowing more damage. Ever heard of "I let myself care too much and got hurt". The more emotion, the more trust, the more "vulnerable" we are.

When someone else holds your energy, it is basically bound to them, they take it in as their own, as if you "belong" to them. When you subconsciously attach your energy to another, it can be retreived by you, once you come to terms by letting go of them and "reclaiming" yourself. Even psychologists/therapists promote letting go and reclaiming who you are. The same goes for dormant energy. Once you can get past what caused it to go dormant, it comes back on its own. This is just a matter of reaching down deep and working things out. Shamans in this case help you along by fighting the battle against your subconscious fears, regrets, etc with you.

But when someone has actually stolen a piece of you consciously or unconsciously...it becomes complicated. Now not only is there your subconscious to deal with, but someone else's manifestations to battle too. This isn't ritual work, this is journeying. Going into a trance, traveling and entering the manifestations of thought and emotion...the stuff of dreams and nightmares. Someone that is unconnected personally to these manifestations have a better chance dealing with them because they are not their fears and insecurites but someone elses. To do it yourself would mean you would need to have the mental and emotional strength and courage to face your own fears head on, manifested right in front of you. No longer just thoughts. Not very many people can do that and I don't advise it for your own sanity. You could do more harm than good.

THANK YOU!!!!!

You're welcome. Blessings. May the spirits guide you.