Is it weird that I'm terrified of practicing magic or any rituals? I realised it's not the magic itself but that people outside the spirituality would mock me ruthessly if they found out. I can get away with just reading about it but... actually practicing?
Knowledge is power. I doubt most understand what magick in its real nature is. It isn't casting fireball at someone, it's altering your world alongside nature's laws.
Once they find out, it will be embarrassing but it always wares off. It always will. Nobody holds these things for explicit periods of time, no, it's just not of human morality.
But if you really won't want anyone knowing, you can easily pan it off as worship to a special god or giving your sentiments and acknowledges to your deceased loved ones.
Magick isn't really something to be ashamed of though. Like I said. Knowledge is power. The more they understand, they more they know, the more they will be more intrigue rather than amused. Perhaps you could start a "magick renaissance" with those willing and wanting to study if found hot and properly informed.
This is not weird at all. Many people face the same problem but we still practice despite this. If you do practice, you don't have to shout it from the mountaintops. For many of us, we are very much integrated into regular society and only our closest loved ones are aware. There are many ways that us practitioners can disguise something even if we chose to wear it in public. For instance, many stones can be embedded into a pendant or a ring, etc but only you will know what it means. For the rest of the world, its just an accessory.
Practice can also be done entirely through visualization to the same effect if you do not wish to use physical items, however you will need to continue reading though to learn how to do it.
Walking along this path is nothing to be ashamed of. I can understand your fear of facing judgment if people in your life may discover what you're doing. But, it's in your heart as this point i'm assuming, and that is what matters the most. Believing and practicing magick is a highly personal decision and you have chosen that for yourself, hopefully for positive reasons. If it helps you live a positive life, then nothing should be wrong with it, but of course society tries to get in the way of that mere thought. Don't be ashamed or afraid; this path is about you and no one else.
the biggest thing i hate about humanity (besides their closed minds at times) is fear
not that that means i don't like you, it means i don't like fear controling others.
if your curious, interested, or it just feels right i say jump in! learn as much as you can! then you can decide based off your own opinion, not others
dont let their fear of the unknown and scarry leave you blinded :( we only have so much time! we need to live it!
