John just graduated from clinical psychology and opens his first office. After some successful advertising he is astounded to have nearly 300 people wanting to be in group therapy. John decides to rent a big hall and invite the entire group. To break the ice, and to get the therapy started, John decides to ask a show of hands how often the attendees had sex. He first asks for a show of hands of all the people who had sex almost every night. A modest number of hands were raised. He then asks, how many had sex once a week? This time a larger number of hands were raised. John then asks how many had sex once or twice a month? Again a few hands were raised. After John polled his group several more times he noticed one guy sitting off to the side with this huge beaming grin on his face. John noticed that the guy never raised his hand, so he asked him how often he had sex. The guy said, Once a year! To John's dismay, he responds, Why are you so happy getting sex only once a year? The grinning guy responds, "Tonights the night!"
wow thats pretty awesome Pat :D!
heres one
Three male ducks walk into a bar. The bartender asks the first duck *What's your name and what have u been doing today?* the duck answers *My name is bill and i have been jumping in and out of puddles all day* Then the bartender asks the second duck the same question and he replies *My name is james and i have been jumping in and out of puddles all day* then he asks th third duck th same question and he replies *Im puddles*
Hope u get it =)
This is a gay joke!
No offense is meant by posting it...
Jack and Bill are sitting in the park and Jack says: "Bill?...i'm gay!"
Bill: "Gay?"
Jack: "yeah Bill...i'm gay"
Bill: "tell me Jack...do you have 5 cars?"
Jack: "no...why?"
Bill: "do you play golf?"
Jack: "no...why do you as.."
Bill: "do you have a big house?"
Jack: "NO...what's your point?"
Bill: "Jack you're not gay you're just a plain fag!"
(I think that it is quite weird to talk joke in this forum, but anyway, there are many people talk about it, so I will join)
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Mr. Lim's son graduated from USA. His son back to his hometown China after end the academic.
Son: Dad, you know, USA moon is brighter than our hometown's.
Dad: ...
Son: Dad, USA air is fresher than our hometown's.
Dad: ...
Son: Dad, you know, USA has a very advance machine, when a pig is put inside a machine, than the pig will be a sausage! So advance. Dad, our country is very poor and stupid.
Dad: (Starting angry) Oh really~ There is more advance in our country. You know? When a sausage is put inside a machine, there will be a pig!
*Get the point?
Oh, is
18
SX
* (You can reply to me in here or the best way is to PM me. Enjoy!)
A half-asleep pregnant woman and her fully awake, extra-muscular husband were eating lunch. The pregnant woman picked up her glass of water and dropped it on the ground. It shattered. She said, "water.........broke....." Then she fell asleep. Her husband jumped up, grabbed her, threw her over his shoulder, and started running. She woke up and yelled, "Honey! What are you doing!!!" He said, "I'm running to the hospital. She screamed and went into labor.