Spill your beans!!!

I have been going thorugh some hard times, personal family issues..
And in my meditation there is some sort of caos, I cant identify a color yet, all I can say it is dark..
Should I be worried that my alter ego is taking power over me?
Any advice?

I can understand the fear of an alter ego or a darker side taking over you.
Usually the more dominant side will prevail.
It is ok to seek balance with this "alter ego"
More than likly it is just the chaos and confusion steming from the problems youve been experiencing That is causing the clouds in your meditation.
Try using ,grounding along with relaxing techniques before meditation to help clear your mind.

like healer said bfore , i imagine my energy as white colored coz i ws taught to do so ,initially...... n when i do grounding or think abt the energy imagine it in me i get an adernaline rush throughout my body...... it feels great!:-)

Everytime I try and meditate I clear my mind and for a while my head starts buzzing..just slightly tho...other times I get a headache or get sleepyand have to stop...is my headache a sign of some sort of energy? I don't see any colors tho...just black

Seeing black is ok. If you feel the energy thats just as good for now.

As far as getting dizy, pick a comfortable position, but one that you couldn't get sleepy with. The headache can be concentrating to much, or having the energy build up in one area. Try focusing on the headache and having the energy from it spread to other places.

I meditated 3 times today...the first time for 5 minutes...the 2nd time for 10 minutes and the last time for 30....and I was holding this doll that represents a spirit that follows my bf...and my hands started tingling...when I meditated I saw this blue ball of light..and it came from my chest...it starts off reall small in my chest..it spins realli fast and it when it gets bigger it comes out of my chest and it sort of showers sparks all off over my body..I can feel them tingling all over...did I do the excersise right?

ya you are doing your excercises right, that result just means you have a lot oif energy stored up in your body and you are flowing it outward and then onto yourself, in a way you are actually putting up a basic energy barrier around your body originating from your chest because all of that energy which you are being showered with (the sparks) will protect you by slowing down attacks made onto you (not physical attacks though)

if u get tired during meditating before you meditate eat a piece of fruit...i ate a really sour orange(on accident) and it made my sleepiness go away.

ya that is true, anything organic really because the fruit is grown and so energy is gathered in it and a positive one at that, i enjoy fruit because it perks up my day

i feel like im drawing energy from the rest of my body i dont see colors but when it reaches my head im in a deep trance i didnt come to until dad knocked on my door