Welcome to suggestions...

OK so bc of certain life events that have happened to me I have began to research paganism and other religions outside of Christianity. To begin with I felt that I was deceiving my faith. Then I started reading about the different colors of magic and other elements of the subject. It has been a bit scary at times. Especially when dealing with TIME in an aspect that I keep finding myself stuck in a rut.
Its almost as if I am in the middle, like torn between good evil. I've been told that is not common. Like I'm in touch with the reality that I possess some sort of abilities, but choosing a side is something I have never been able to do. However, due to visions I have had I feel that I have been chosen. Its as if I've been given a second way of seeing people, the world, life itself and everything. SO, if anyone can relate I feel that anything might help at this point. I am also welcome to suggestions of any type of literature that may give me more information.

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This thread has been moved to Misc Topics from Introduce Yourself.

You're not a professional psychiatrist, AkPos, so please stop trying to tell people that their experiences are schizophrenic.

LadyA, if you feel like choosing between Christianity and Paganism is like being torn between good and evil, are you not already looking at things from a Christian perspective? There is nothing evil about Paganism except in what individual people do and you'd get that anywhere.

Also consider Christopaganism, which is a syncretic religion involving the Abrahamic God being above the other Pagan Gods (as Paganism is often viewed as European polytheistic religions).

I woudl also like to point out that there's actually nothing inherently magical about Paganism, either. Can Pagans practice magic? Yes, but that doesn't make Paganism a magickal practice.

LadyA317 and AkPos, may I remind you both that writing in text speak is not permitted on this site. Please spell out your words completely. Many here do not speak English as a first language and text speak is confusing to them.

If you feel you are mentally ill, then I suggest you go get yourself checked out by a psychiatrist.