I think the reason I have gone from religion to religion, philosophy to philosophy is my desire for power. Although I get angry and paranoid, I think I could really be a powerful person if I work hard enough. However, I have a barrier in my mind and spirit against black magic; to play with free will might cause serious punishment now and after my death.
I have a natural affinity for stichomancy/bibliomancy, but I don't think these will totally serve my purposes. How can you help me?
Thank you for the Socratic-style question. It is wearisome to seek something without knowing what it is. Power means one thing: respect. This might be material, such as in a corporation or classroom. However, I am here for my desire to have spiritual power. I want to be respected by a spiritual creature because it was I who gave it entrance into the material world. Communing with these creatures and conjuring them into a material existence is enchanting.
I know that conjuring a sentient being that is non-material is very difficult. There might be procedures, like rituals that invite that kind of being, which in itself requires practice, trial, and error. The concepts, though, are even more challenging. What is actually happening there. I assume it might be similar to a way a prayer works: opening a dimensional method of contact, maybe using concepts from physics like wormholes. Some beings, such as a water elemental, might be convinced to travel but not strong enough to with stand the trip; it would take a very serious and powerful practitioner of magic to convince a being powerful enough to withstand the trip to take the trip. Like convincing a king to come visit my apartment... It's only a dream. But if I were a powerful being, it would be more like the president inviting a king to The White House.
Getting it here is one part, staying in power once it is here is another trial. It is almost impossible to practice that. Maybe with astral projection it can be practiced, but that kind of practice session would still be immaterial.
I know I just need to take it slow, but even being in awe of such power, perhaps being a witness to, aide, or apprentice at such an event is just as enchanting as being the actual practitioner.
I will first applaud you on the fluent vocabulary. It something I will rarely see from someone without a rank.
Second, power, or rather respect as you have previously stated, will be earned through trust with someone or thing. I would suggest to proceed with caution yet passion which you seem to have down pat already. I have little to no experiences with communing/interacting with spiritual beings as one may clearly see.
However, I hope that my advice strikes sound for you.