AngieD, I agree that abusers abuse to make themselves feel powerful because really they are powerless and angry about that. And I wasn't suggesting Sirena017 to abuse her father, I was saying that if my father hit me and called me worthless, I would break his jaw and... well, you get the point.
Trust me, there's been many a time that I wanted to break his jaw. But I knew that wouldn't lead to what I ultimately wanted: love. And it seems Neptune has granted me that ;)
If your father is hurting you, tell an adult at your school and make sure to take pictures of bruises and stuff when he hits you. That way you have proof of what he's doing to you. Look, what he's doing isn't love and he should never make you feel that way. Abusive men abuse people to make themselves feel better and they tell you stuff like that to make you feel bad because they can feel powerful for a while. If your family knows it goes on and is doing nothing they're just as guilty as he is. What he's doing to you isn't love, like you said if someone loves you they would never hurt you like that. Keep praying to Neptune and do whatever you can to get yourself out. Start telling as many adults as you can at school. Counselors are good because they know how to talk to you and be sure to tell them the whole story, don't leave anything back and if your afraid don't be because if your a minor A.K.A your under the age of eighteen there are people that can remove you so that you never have to see him again. I know a person who has gotten herself out because she made herself heard. She spent years trying but, she got out eventually. After everyone told her there was nothing they could do she still didn't give up and eventually she didn't have to stay with her abusive father any more and don't worry, I have permission to share this part of the story from her. Look, what I'm saying is, you have options. You can go tell someone at your school exactly what happens to you and that it scares you. I guarantee you if your a minor in the U.S. Child Protective Services is not going to send you home if they have proof that you are in danger. Don't listen to what your family says because this is not love and I guarantee you the longer you stay the worse it will get. If your an adult find a friend who you trust completely and go stay at her house until you can find a job and somewhere to live. Either way, it's better than being with your Dad. Oh, and if your friends are telling you it's his way of loving you you should probably find some new friends. No offense to you but it sounds like they're not taking how you feel into account. I know friends are hard to come by but if they don't support you why are they your friends? Hope this helps.
Sirens
You can go to an emergency room and they will document the abuse and call authorities. They are required to by law.
You are worthwhile and you don't deserve to be treated like that.
As for connecting with Neptune, follow it and see where it takes you. I'm currently following a path told to me by someone who has been dead for over 20 years. I even went to a psychiatrist to chech myself out. ;)
Take care and be well
Re: My "Real" Father By: WhiteRav3n / Knowledgeable
Post # 15 Dec 13, 2011
Get proof before going to authorities, but do go to someone with actual authority (not your friends and family). The reason for proof is simply this, if you're father is a good liar, and it's your word against his, they will have no evidence and that's how people end up dead. To those suggesting siren just go to authorities, please in the future tell someone to take audio or video recordings secretly first. With webcams being fastened to computers, it is very easy and unsuspecting. Use a place like photobucket to save it off of your computer where it can not be found. Phones are equally easy to capture evidence from. Bruises are not enough. People have thrown themselves down stairs before and blamed it on their parents or husbands. Due to people like that, it takes more to convince authorities.
To inform you all of how bad it can be, I saw this one women, alone in a restaurant looking very upset. I sat down near her and started up small talk. Turns out, she was a social worker for the city and was upset over a case of hers where little children's limbs were dunked in boiling water on the stove as "punishment". She thought it was an open and shut case, but they were given back to their parents. The woman was nearly crying. Injury is not "proof", the only cases that are pretty much guaranteed are those with video or audio recording or both.
But you have to be strong Siren and cannot allow your friends or family from guilting you. They may be right, your father may love you very much, but he has a serious problem. He has anger issues and you can't help him. By continuing to remain a victim, you are only encouraging his behavior and it WILL get worse, no doubt about it. It never gets better unless THEY see what they're doing as wrong. The more they get away with, the farther they go. The only way you can help him is by going to authorities with proof. Trying to resolve this yourself is dangerous.
Now, for the spiritual side of this. Sure I could look at this psychologically. But I'm not going to, because right now you need belief. So let's look at this purely spiritually ok? Do you know what I tell my daughter? I tell her that there is a "big mama" and a "big daddy"--the mother of all and the father of all. That from mom (me) and dad's love, she was created. But the big mama and the big daddy made that possible by creating the world through their love.
Now of course you're not five years old, but I hope you get my point. Yes, you have a biological father, but if you have belief in higher powers/divinity/deities than the archetype you feel most connects to your view of that "source" is also a parental figure. You don't aspire to be like them, you learn from them and by doing so, gain a deeper understanding of who you are. This can be extremely self empowering and I applaud you for believing in yourself and your own thoughts. This is the true beauty of faith. It shouldn't be used as a crutch, excuse, or escape, but as a way to better ourselves on all levels.
In most religions, the divinity is seen as a parent. So you feeling a father / daughter relationship with Neptune is not odd to me at all.
If a witch can draw down the moon, invoking the goddess herself and if a high magician can summon an ancient deity or daemon, then why can't Neptune be communicating to you through your dreams? But no matter who or what these dreams are, ALWAYS use your own common sense with everything. Never take what anyone says as 100% truth--not me, not your family, not Neptune. You know deep down what the truth is. You didn't even need to post this topic. You have to start believing in yourself. You're a smart young woman.
I agree with Whiterav3n. Don't let your father try and shut you up if someone actually manages to come asking about it. My friend, and I also have permission to share this had a jerky psychologist who interrogated her father and all her siblings in the exact same room and decided to violate client patient confidentiality by telling her a lot of the goings on in another one of his clients relationships and then proceeded to tell her how lucky she was that wasn't he and that she had a family that loved her and at least that was a good thing. He hadn't even been in there ten seconds when he was already picking sides. The guy was a fruit cake that the courts ordered to have to do some sort of evaluation on the whole family. Then her family left before the evaluation could be completed and the man decided without ever talking to the kids alone or talking to the mother about what was going on that he was fit to actually judge what was going on. Anyway, my point is that Whiterav3n is right. Your the one who can make your own decisions. Don't let your family, or your father make you feel guilty about what happened with you and your Dad. He's the one who decided to hurt you and insult you. Remember to tell yourself that whatever happened isn't your fault. If he insults you just tell yourself, not out loud though that he's an insecure bully who's rude and doesn't care about anyone else but himself. He's taking his problems out on you so, in your head you should try putting the blame back on him. Just tell yourself that he's the one with the intelligince issues because if he was smart he wouldn't be treating his kid that way. Tell yourself that he's the worthless one because one because if he had any sense of self worth of self-esteem he would be hurting you, now would he?
I would say that Neptune is your God (i know im not putting that right but you know what i mean) and he does love and protect you. I would suggest researching about his different aspects his myths, and pray to him. Its good whenever a god reveals himself to someone.
I appreciate everyone's support, I probably should have included that I am a legal adult! And fortunately that I no longer live with my father. Also that the physical abuse never was enough to leave marks, it was usually him punching a wall, pushing me, or grabbing me hard, but not had enough to bruise. Some may not consider this abuse, but any time some one touches you in a way that is inappropriate it is abusive! However most of it was him depreciating me. The abuse happened a while ago, throughout my late teens. I don't know if many of you are familiar with energy bodies but mine was definitely damaged! It's taken me many years to overcome the pain, but I've started talking about it with understanding people, such as yourselves.
Also I should have included that not ALL of my friends support his actions, it's mainly two that are family friends that think he's a "great" father. However, nearly all of my family either supports him or is unaware of what happened.
But I'm very happy of how supportive of how you all have been about my visions of Neptune! I feel a lot better about the experience instead of thinking that I am crazy or that I am a bad person!
