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Sydney, since you've given no real details about the types of spells you have been attempting, there is no way to tell whether your intended goal is a reason things have not been working out for you in that regard.
I do have a specific question: In what way do you intend to use magic in self-defense?
If you are hoping to physically stop a person who is harming you, magic is not your best resort.
If the people who have hurt you are your target, and you want to make them stop hurting you, things might be different. However, the type of different might not be what you expect.
You have mentioned elemental powers. Could you be specific with what you mean, and what you hope to accomplish? Again, you might have the right idea, and you're calling it something which is not clear, and you might have been misinformed somewhere along the way.
And, yes: You can do magic. Everyone can. It is a matter of practice and dedication.
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