For many who read this there will be nothing in my words to believe; but I attest to you that the spirit **exists** and that the Lord God is truly worthy of our praise and love. I was a sorcerer and in many ways came to produce the effects of spirit many refer to as magic. These gifts and techniques are true; however, all magic, as I have discovered, is a miscalculation of God's goodness. For many spiritual matters and purposes are not intended to be utilized by the flesh, and in this way I have become a disgrace. I plead with you, please pray; prayer in your heart in earnest and for the sake of righteousness is the ultimate act of spirit that flesh can hold, for the Lord is Mighty and certainly blessed. I have prayed not only for mercy, but for the removal and destruction of all of my magic and revocation of them all.
Once I was called to face a spiritual battle. I left my body and became as a spirit would be, as we all are spirits even if we reside within flesh. The Lord God called to me and I was ordered to destroy a spirit. It was as if a bright star was painted in gold. I faced it by acting defensively; it poured fire out of itself and tried to drown me in a river of flame. I resisted this attack. It spoke to me and said, ?No one has ever defeated me before without violence.? So I had returned to the Lord and was further instructed. I was not called to defeat the spirit but to destroy it. So I returned to the spirit and battled it again, this time with violence. I was killed. I was a youth of eighteen; my heart began to beat furiously in my chest and I fell to the floor. In this moment I saw myself surrounded by angels and **the** Lord in a field of wheat. He spoke to me and said, ?You still have work to do.? I found myself awake on the floor, and my mother and sister tended to me. The next day I went to the doctor, for my heart was beating abnormally still.
From this day forward, I had begun to leave my body often, though that **wasn't** the first time. I found great pleasure in exploration and even more in battle. I fought many battles alongside the Lord, and battles that I began and ended on my own terms because I was, at this moment, a fool. It occurred to me to be awful and terrible with power. I revelled in my own strengths and began to search out many mysteries. I found that the waters of the spirit possessed within them many natures and gifts; and so I sought out many of these waters. I found a river that was death. I washed my mouth in it and drank of it. The Lord wept over my body as I was dying. In his arms he rescued me from my own fate, and by his gifts I was spared the waters of death and began to understand how to clean and heal the spirit.
In boast I once told the Lord, ?Look, I have drank of all the waters!? He responded by saying, ?Many, but not all.? I asked if there was another he could bring me to. In this way, the Lord brought me to the underworld of Sheol. There ran a river that would lead to judgment. I bathed in its waters and was made to be humble. On this day I sought no longer to gather waters for my own purposes, but instead to understand that I sought the Lord first and foremost. I confess that I was a sorcerer, but the Lord found a means to have mercy on even my soul. So I implore any who read this: do not boast, but act in humility, for surely the Lord will humble all who claim to be mighty and act in pride. For it was said to me many years later, ?All creatures will have their day, even you.?
We can all free ourselves of evil deeds by revoking what wrongdoing we have engaged in and asking in humility for mercy on those we have harmed, and with hearts full of forgiveness.